Unquiet Desperation
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Author Topic: The Laxative Approach  (Read 6167 times)
Ploe
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« on: May 01, 2008, 04:30:08 PM »

Why is it that so many so-called writers in my view can't put words together? I read your writing and you can tell, just tell, that you've had no fun when scratching your beloved ink onto page. How come there is no wordplay, or power punch? And when there is how come it feels so contrived? Like you aren't too sure what you're writing about. You're either too abstract or too concrete.

Do you write because it's easy? Well how come you're getting it wrong? You know nothing of looking at a word and thinking "Yeah! That's just right." You're too busy trying to get something to rhyme, or to paint a clear image, or to not make sense at all.

You have to swim in your lexicon, and drown hard in the moment. When you write it has to make perfect sense and you have to shout "YES! YES! YES! I'M DOING IT! MAMA, LOOK AT ME!". Your art has to mean everything to you while you're pumping it out, so when you give it to those less fortunate you can be proud that you've coughed out something worth giving.

Tell me, why can't you write.
« Last Edit: May 05, 2008, 11:00:06 PM by Ploe » Logged
Mr. Goldberg
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« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2008, 12:44:25 PM »

Why don't you show us something you've written net ferret ? Or maybe you can't. Maybe it's just like uncle Barney said. A little laxative goes a long long way. A Sonnet a day keeps the shisters at bay ?  Ferrets ? Don't talk to me about Ferrets ? Waddya mean ? They can clean out a butcher's tray or a baby's pram in minutes. No trace. Me and Uncle Barney used to look at the Ferrets in the market he'd have 'em everywhere... up his arms, down his trousers. He was an honourable man. Took no prisoners. Never a stranger to the barber. Slap on the Brylcreem, Clap on a Bap,  something for the weekend sir and back to the Ferrets. Smoke ? He was a chimney. He was six chimneys.
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Vix0r
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« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2008, 09:25:13 PM »

You're annoying.

When I read what you type there is this strange warning in my head. It goes thus: "spam spam spam spam" but I could easily change it to: "idiot idiot idiot idiot".
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Ploe
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« Reply #3 on: June 23, 2008, 06:15:40 AM »

Indeed Mr. Goldberg, sir. Clicky click on my name, the lilac blue thing that reads "Ploe" and then press down hard on "Show the last posts of this person," once the page loads. Then scroll through two or three pages of sheer Ploe delight. Rarely a rhyme, and assonace on tap. I think my work will be up your alley.
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Mr. Goldberg
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« Reply #4 on: June 23, 2008, 11:30:01 AM »

Allies ? Don't talk to me about alleys ! Waddya mean ! Old Uncle Barney spent a lot of his time down alleys he used to say ..."Nat never walk on the poavement when there's an alley behind it Up the alley down the alley what's the difference ? An alley's an alley" he used to say. "Why use the pavement when there's more to be had up the alley." And he did. But he'd always shout out "SURPRISE!" before he did anything ! 
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Vix0r
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« Reply #5 on: June 23, 2008, 07:18:31 PM »

You should be in Looney Tunes. You'd be brilliant.
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Will
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« Reply #6 on: June 23, 2008, 08:31:56 PM »

As far as poetry goes, I don't have the charm to woo a reader away from reality.  Besides, every thing's poetry; we're all shitty poets (while some of us are also good poets).  I'm just a shitty poet, but I have things inside that need to come out.  I like writing short stories, but sometimes I can't write those because I'm too impatient to tell the story correctly.   
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I think, therefore I'm lost.
~vxn~
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« Reply #7 on: June 23, 2008, 09:46:24 PM »

Quote
They can clean out a butcher's tray or a baby's pram in minutes.

^ i fiercely enjoyed that line.
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another glowing exit sign and me with no way out
Mr. Goldberg
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« Reply #8 on: June 24, 2008, 12:59:29 PM »

I fiercely enjoy you Trixy Vixy ! My muse and yours should get together !!!   Wink
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Ploe
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« Reply #9 on: July 01, 2008, 12:22:31 PM »

I'm just a shitty poet, but I have things inside that need to come out.  I like writing short stories, but sometimes I can't write those because I'm too impatient to tell the story correctly.   

Will, I like your stuff. Your pieces are normally upbeat, and you can tell you've had fun writing 'em. You seem the sort of person that writes in short bursts and you're happy with the output.  But if you try to write anything longer, you know it isn't up to your personal standards when you're barely finished. Amirite?
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Will
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« Reply #10 on: July 01, 2008, 02:26:16 PM »

Will, I like your stuff. Your pieces are normally upbeat, and you can tell you've had fun writing 'em. You seem the sort of person that writes in short bursts and you're happy with the output.  But if you try to write anything longer, you know it isn't up to your personal standards when you're barely finished. Amirite?

Youarite.  I'm try to change my mindset when I attempt something longer...intense attention to detail, thorough character development, etc.  It's just not me, although I have fun trying. 
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I think, therefore I'm lost.
Ploe
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« Reply #11 on: July 29, 2008, 10:50:12 PM »

People are too modest 'round here. If you write, you should know you're the fucking best, and you should know you got it right first time. If you feel the feedback that people give you is right, you're no writer. Stick by your words people, fight for their honour. Don't let some schmuck like me tell you you're shite. FEEDBACK IS FOR WIMPS.
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~vxn~
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« Reply #12 on: July 31, 2008, 01:17:36 PM »

that was quite a motivational post, ploe.

i'm going to go about my day thinking i am the best poet to ever live.  sure, i'm usually the only person reading my collections... hahahaha...

been writing up a storm lately--all shite.  i'm going to pretend better works have never been penned.  then i'm going to go out to a local pub and celebrate my genius.  repeatedly. 
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another glowing exit sign and me with no way out
Ploe
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« Reply #13 on: August 01, 2008, 01:41:11 PM »

That can't be. I'm the greatest poet to ever grace this fine globe. You and I, vxn, should be rivals. Battle of the Bards and all that.

As Uncle Barney used to say "Nothing beats a spot of healthy competition. But unhealthy competition etc etc etc..."
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Mr. Goldberg
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« Reply #14 on: August 01, 2008, 02:02:41 PM »

"....healthy competition means someone gets the rabbit's entrails down their front...."  he always said that, he did,  as he was chewing that bunny's chest - its back legs still kicking....

Old Uncle Barney  "...why cook it later  when it's still warm now ?" he'd say. Didn't believe in freezers.
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~vxn~
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« Reply #15 on: August 11, 2008, 10:56:42 PM »

every literary genius needs an arch nemesis--it's settled then, ploe.  lol.

(laughing quite hard @ still warm.  i may be a vegetarian--but i can appreciate warm meat.  take that how you will.)
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another glowing exit sign and me with no way out
Mr. Goldberg
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« Reply #16 on: August 12, 2008, 12:05:15 PM »

Oh I certainly will Vix. I certainly will  Wink
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Ploe
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« Reply #17 on: August 21, 2008, 09:14:32 PM »

My brain has been crunching on what is outside of it for the last week, so I haven't had a blast with my pen properly. Being occupied is terrible for an artist.
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Will
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« Reply #18 on: August 22, 2008, 03:00:03 PM »

Being occupied is terrible for an artist.

It's especially terrible for the alcoholic artist.   
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I think, therefore I'm lost.
Vix0r
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« Reply #19 on: August 22, 2008, 04:42:19 PM »

I'll tell you what is terrible for an artist, or an art practitioner: being raised by all who strongly hold the idea that getting qualification after qualification will be best in life. Without it you will get no job, no income, nobody will even want to know you or even look at your shoe prints as you walk away dejected. That is how I've been raised.

So I did the standard grades, I got all five highers, even an advanced higher, and am now studying for a degree. Has this helped? Has this now enabled me to get a good job, or even good prospects? Has it left me with what I want to have achieved?

Has it fuck.

I am now hating where I am in life, stuck in this degree because it's free and my mind has been altered to worry about never having any prospects if I abandoned this shite, with never having just gone around practicing and building up on experience in the art field. I will end up as an assistant to a company or shop, hate that too, all the while sitting with these qualifications that took up all my time and left me with nothing but some pieces of paper that will enable me to get a slightly better shit job that I will detest.

Art will now become my hobby instead of my livelihood unless I can get out of here and get myself a whole room where I am able to make a glorious mess with my paints and just go mad! I can't bloody wait and I hope when I get that room, I use it. I'd be an idiot not to.

Yes, I am in a shit mood.
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